Haircut

I had a dream. I stole a bunch of money from grandma. Mom found it. I gave it back, but still kept some. Leigh drove back to get it.
Cut.
I want a haircut. Bad.
I’m at the Peakview house with mom
She knew I wanted to steal pills.
She had a new Louise Vuitton purse.
I asked if she would buy me a haircut,
She said no.
And I was confused.
because she had a new thousand dollar purse.
There was something evil in the house.
I tried to board it up,
make it go away.
It gave me chills.
We left and saw a hair dresser,
but it was late.
She said my hair was too long
I could only be comfortable
if I put it up.

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The Rehab Means Something to Me.

The rehab means something to me. It’s a place. It’s a metaphor. It’s a turning point. It represents the point between two lines in my life that are vastly different. But I’m the same me, the same Jordan. The first line includes childhood. School. Happiness. But then destruction. The destruction led to Events and Addictions that couldn’t be turned around without drastic measures. There were many attempts. Many hopes. But many failures. The failures soon led to Hopelessness and Misery. Until rehab became the only salvageable option. The image of my grandmother keeps coming to mind. She was one of my hopes and inspirations of turning my life around. All she wanted for me was happiness, which meant sobriety and a relationship with God. So, rehab. The point that changed my life around. Made me able to stop the Destruction, especially the Self Destruction. Gave me back my hope and courage. Led me to where I am in my life now. On a Spiritual Journey, going through Personal Growth every day that I never knew could be imagineable. Now I couldn’t imagine it any other way. Hope, Faith, Courage. My Grandma must be looking down on me with tears of joy rolling down her rosy cheek, which makes me smile and tear up as well. I have so much potential. The world is at my hands and feet. I can do anything and everything as long as I can dream and imagine it then work my ass of for it. I am so blessed not only to be alive but to be well and happy and on my way to whatever I can dream of.